Explanation For my Absence

My beloved Papaw passed away.  He lived really far away from us.  But his passing was unexpected to say the least.  Between that and the medication switch and also the newly diagnosis I just don't  know what to do.  My friend actually called me and was wondering how I was doing.  I feel like I really need to get it out but nobody really understands.  I think that by not having a service for him is not good.  I am really disappointed.  I know that he is going to be buried alongside my grandma who passed away 5 years ago.  I really miss them both. Last year my Aunt passed away when it was a few days from Christmas.  It was really hard on everyone.  She was like an adopted Mom to me.  I really miss her I miss her advice I miss eating supper with her I miss crafting with her.  I miss it all.  I really feel sorry for myself.  I feel like I was left all alone.  I keep trying to think positive I keep praying but I just don't understand why the people who have really shaped my life are gone.  It really sucks.  I am hoping to get some baking done today I have a cookout that I am invited to.  I really want to go to that too.  So I was thinking from all that has happened this week that I shouldn't go but you know what I need to get out and to quit wallering around in self pitty. Hope that you don't mind me being gone from blogging it's just been so swamped.